Try Dudeism! A religion based upon the Big Lebowski. “The Church of the Latter Day Dude.”
Instant Online Ordination!
As an ordained Dudeist Priest you can legally perform all varieties of religious ceremonies in most U.S. States (check with your local County Clerk first). Preside over a wedding, a funeral, a bris, a baptism, or even a pet-spaying ceremony with pride and authority!
(Oh, and by the way, this actually works in many states.)